3rd weeks working with N Society

Today is the end of 3rd week of work and all I've done was reading and reading of the Rules and regulation of the society. Somehow I think of it, is kind of irony. LOL.....
Why? I am a L Society scholar! The L Society sponser my degree study but I didnt work for them after graduate. Instead I work for N Society, a sort of L society rivals LOL.... So am I consider a betrayer? Well, upon my graduate the L Society didnt offer me any job and allow me to look for other company but must be in Singapore marine industry. During my study for my degree, all along I thought I have no worries and can work in L Society. Working in L Society is a kind of prestige or classy I would say and so is other Societies if you working with one of them.  Hahaha... however, that didnt happen, I was wrong. I put it as kind of unwanted or been disowned!
Now I working with N Society, and had inform to the L Society my status. Frankly speaking, I dont know how they feel? or how they look at me? Is isnt my fault as they never offer me a job and I want to make them feel that is a lost for them for not employing me as their member. In order to do that, I need to work my way up in N society, proving how good am I. So I got to take all the hardship and shit even if tough. Am I evil or not? I not too sure....

Beside thinking of work, I also come to have thought of GOD... LOL... Crazy right LOL.... I believe each of us have individual GOD looking after us. He/She be following you and offer or punished you along your life. They are like our guidance with special power but we cant see them. They offer their power to us but still is up to us whether to accept or reject. Have this thought is because of my friend Steph, we somehow after working in Qatar, we both have kind of similar situation running along our life in Singapore now.... but her God is been nice to her abit I would say LOL... cos she never lost money and I DID!!!!!

2 more days to go and it is Chinese New Year, and I feel crying sometime too... not bout work not bout my present life... is something I learnt from the past and it is a Regret and a mark in my life......